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SONG: "Who Wants To Live Forever"
ARTIST: Queen
ALBUM: "A Kind Of Magic"
YEAR: 1986
IN MEMORIAM:
VALERIE G. HUDSON (MUM)
4/6/1946 - 12/27/2022
If I could live with my Mum forever, then I would want to live forever. Unfortunately, we humans don't live forever and we go through life losing the ones we love until our own time is up. This has been the hardest week of my entire life, no question. My mother passed away at 76 years old. I'm thankful to have had 48 of those years with her. As I grew older, my Mum and I were becoming more than parent and child. We were really best of friends. She loved to take rides and have me take her shopping or get her McFrappie's at McDonald's! She loved life, and I feel she still had more life in her. A few years back, she was diagnosed with dementia. The disease really took it's toll on her in a short time. But even with this horrific disease, she still had life and especially, lots of love. Though conversations were getting harder, she loved to laugh and loved to give out hugs even more. On the morning of December 23, 2022, my Mum fell, hitting her head causing severe injuries to her face and head. She had bleeding in her brain. We don't know if she got dizzy, passed out or if she had an aneurysm. All we knew was that we had to get her to the hospital and pray for the best. The best quickly turned into the worst. We were told on Christmas Eve that my Mum was not going to make it. The injuries to the brain were too bad and they told us we have to make a decision to pull the breathing tube. This was the most difficult decision we had to make as a family. Ultimately, me, my Dad and my sister decided that we couldn't let her suffer anymore. She essentially would have been on a breathing tube for the rest of her life and most likely would have never regained consciousness. On Christmas Day, we told the doctors to pull the breathing tube. Me and my sister stayed in the hospital by her side from that point on. We didn't want to leave her and we didn't want her to die alone. My Mum was abandoned as a child and I vowed not to leave her side till she passed. We should have known that our Mum is a fighter, always has been. She was going to die on her terms. For almost 3 days me and my sister were by her side with no sleep and little to eat or drink. On Tuesday, December 27, 2022, we were both exhausted, mentally and physically. The nurses were practically begging us to go home and get some rest. I finally looked at my sister at about 1:30am and I told her we had to go. We were killing ourselves. We agreed to go, get some sleep and come back first thing in the morning. I didn't want to leave because I had a sinking feeling like she wasn't going to make it. My fears came true. A couple hours later, I received a phone call from the hospital informing me that my Mum had passed. I really feel like she didn't want us to see her die. There was a moment the day before where my Mum stopped breathing and me and my sister were almost uncontrollable with tears and pain. After a few minutes of not breathing, she mustered a really deep breath. Almost as if she left her body, saw us in pain and returned to her body. Once we were gone, she knew she could let go. Once a Mum, always a Mum. Always looking to protect her loved ones. I still feel my Mum around me. I often ask for her help and guidance and to keep me calm in overwhelming or frustrating situations. I know she will always be the guardian angel looking over our family. She was, and still is the heart of my family. We will miss her funny personality. We will miss her laugh that would make you cry in laughter with her and we will miss those hugs that were so full of motherly love. We will forever miss the comfort she provided. Even on her death bed, I felt a comfort just being next to her, in holding her hand. Or like my picture above, when I put her hand on mine. I felt like when I did that, it was like she was telling me that everything will be ok. All I will tell anyone is never take for granted what you have. Sometimes life gets in the way and it's understandable. We all work, we all have things we have to do. All I'm saying is always appreciate the one's you love and never ever take for granted how much time you have with them. I'll just finish this saying I love you Mum and I miss you more and more each day. Everywhere I go, I see something that reminds me of you and that makes me happy. It's so soon right now and those things make me cry right now but I'm sure in the coming weeks or months, those things will make me smile and laugh because I know you loved to laugh. I'll see you on the other side Mum. I can't wait for that big hug from you when I get there.
Rest in peace Mum
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